Being & Building Followers & Friends of Jesus
The Theme for GEMS this year is wisdom. We are looking into Proverbs a great deal. This is a book I have not tended to dig into much because it seemed like a big "to do" list, especially Proverbs 31. I always had the unsettling feeling that I didn't measure up and might just be the fool Solomon the Wise and your mother warned you about.
Wisdom really does not get a lot of press these days. People are smart or savvy or intelligent, but no one talks much about having wisdom or discernment. Yet, these things are highly valued by God.
I am feeling right now like I lack wisdom in a lot of areas. I can't seem to get a handle on finances. Money just seems to be running through my fingers lately. So many things I depend on, like cell phones etc. that cost money to replace, just seem to be self-destructing on me.
I am stalled in my "career" but have no idea how to move ahead. I cringe at sending out the resume I have, and I don't seem to have any "feet in the door" anywhere at the moment. I also don't seem to interview well. I do seem to make a good impression when I actually am in a situation, substitute teaching or volunteering, but when more long term or permanent opportunities come along I always either miss them or am passed over.
These and other situations seem like sorts of things I "should" be able to work on and "make better." However, when I try, I just spin my wheels and get more anxious and frustrated.
When I go to God and ask for wisdom, He offers me the wisdom of the branch. "Abide," He says. "Rest and remain firmly grafted. Accept with joy the seasons of your life; spring budding and growing, summer fruit and harvest, then the riotous release of beautifully lifeless leaves to the wind."
Strange, that they are most beautiful at the moment of their death and separation from the branch that nurtured them. Yet, it is no use to cling to last year's leaves when spring buds come.
"Except even, the bleakness of winter, stretching bravely toward the sky and accepting the chillingly exquisite burden of snow and ice. It is a season of resting in the promise of spring to come."
So, I am seeking to relax and let the sap flow from the trunk that is Jesus, let the Wind of the Spirit blow me and my leaves where He will, and dig deep into the sustaining soil of the Word and prayer, so I can wave joyful leaves of verdant life in praise and bear fruit in season. Silly me to try and bear my own fruit, when I am just a branch.